Hi, my name is _______ and I am _______.

Hi, my name is Toni and I am a type B-introvert procrastinator.

Yep… that’s a mouthful; it’s also pretty new. When I look back at my teens and twenties I remember myself as an extrovert. I used to be talkative to a fault. I used to  be a bit of a  party animal, with too many friends, and able to talk to anyone about anything. In retrospect,  I realize that I started to change sometime in my early thirties.

Reading a bit on the subject I did find that young extroverts sometimes turn into introverts later on as they hone in their likes, dislikes, and values. Well, that makes sense to me.

When I was younger, I would pride myself about the fact that I had many friends, all different, with whom I could engage in different activities. I could easily place each of my friends in groups: party friends, artsy friends, one-on-one friends, and so on. I do remember that I had a hard time finding friends that met all my likes so I had to compartmentalize them. And that worked.

Now, I have fewer friends. I still keep in touch with a lot of the people I used to be friends with in my youth (thanks Facebook) but since I have moved a lot and further away it’s been harder to make close friends who also happen to live close by. I also realize that I find it harder and harder to put myself out there; to engage with others. The relaxed, one thing at a time, sense of no urgency of my type B; and my chronic procrastination probably don’t help with this.

I recently took an online personality test just for kicks and I have to say that the questions really made me think and realize how much I have changed. I usually don’t give too much power to these online free tests but I did find the results insightful. The test indicated that I was ISTJ (Introverted, Sensitive, Thinking, Judging) but that I showed equal tendency to sensitive and intuition, so I could also be INTJ. I should mention that I don’t believe in astrology but according to astrology I am a Gemini so there’s a joke here somewhere.

OK… so I have to agree with a lot of the things said here… this is what I have discovered (directly quoted from website; my comments in italics):

• ISTJs are often called inspectors. They have a keen sense of right and wrong, especially in their area of interest and/or responsibility. They are noted for devotion to duty. Punctuality is a watchword of the ISTJ. My bosses love me.
• ISTJs often give the initial impression of being aloof and perhaps somewhat cold. I don’t mean to I promise.
• ISTJs are most at home with “just the facts, Ma’am.” They seem to perform at highest efficiency when employing a step-by-step approach. This explains why I don’t like cooking without a recipe.
• ISTJs are easily frustrated by the inconsistencies of others, especially when the second parties don’t keep their commitments. But they usually keep their feelings to themselves unless they are asked. And when asked, they don’t mince words. Truth wins out over tact. OMG! This is so true. I used to be much worse though. I am more tactful now.

Apparently… I also have some INTJ in me… here’s what I could agree about that description.

• When it comes to their own areas of expertise INTJs will be able to tell you almost immediately whether or not they can help you, and if so, how. INTJs know what they know, and perhaps still more importantly, they know what they don’t know. Spot on!
• INTJs are perfectionists, with a seemingly endless capacity for improving upon anything that takes their interest. My problem is that in my own research I often get sucked in the “it’s not ready” trap. This has affected the pursuit of my PhD greatly.
• This explains my failed relationships and my chronic singlehood: INTJs tend to have little patience and less understanding of such things as small talk and flirtation. To complicate matters, INTJs are usually extremely private people, and can often be naturally impassive as well, which makes them easy to misread and misunderstand.

This was actually a really fun activity and I am happy to have shared it here. I also realized that the one area that has changed the most is really my extrovert/introvert dimension. While I was reading the ESTJ and ENTJ descriptions I could see a younger me in there. It’s a little weird. In any case, this is who I am, and I must love it.

Thank you Kat from Mama’s Losin It for her weekly writing prompts. If you’d like to participate you can subscribe to receive her weekly prompts here.